Another milestone among many has come along this week: I returned to work yesterday, after 12 weeks of maternity leave. It has not been an easy task. Yesterday, Juan had the day off and so leaving Logan with him all day wasn't so bad. Of course I still missed him and it was the first time I had been away from him for more than 2 hours. It was also the first time Juan had cared for him all alone for so long -- and his comment after just a couple of hours into it was "I didn't know this was going to be so time consuming! I'm not getting anything done!" Hmmmm... sounds like my broken record.
Anyway, early this morning I had to leave Logan at his new caregiver's home. I held it together pretty well until I got in the car to head on to work. Sigh....
I never used to be much of a crier. I've always kind of hid behind some tough exterior that my whole family seems to have. None of us really show much emotion around each other, like it's a taboo. It's kind of sad really. But anyway, since meeting Juan, I've noticed that I have softened up quite a bit, which is rewarding most of the time. However, I find myself more prone to crying as well. And it tripled in force during my post partum blues - which is a whole other blog entry to write about. Crying at work is also not appealing. Thank goodness it's summer and the office is pretty quiet and empty.
Today's events... well... they do deserve some shedding of tears. Just like how I cried when Logan had his first shots a few weeks back. And I really doubt it will be the last of the tears. I think this childcare/back to work stuff will have me down for a while. And sometimes I just have to cry to actually feel a bit better.
On the positive side of things, I do get to go feed Logan during my lunch hour (which I'm allowed to take whenever I want to fit his schedule). I get to pump for breastmilk throughout the day at work without loss of time (although thats when I seem to tear up the most). And Logan seems to be in good care. I don't think we as moms are ever completely satisfied with someone else's care beyond our own. Or at least that seems to be how I feel. But his caregiver has 4 children of her own and seems to have a good grasp on caring for her small group of children in her home.
After returning to work from feeding Logan today, I said to a co-worker "I'm sure I'll get used to it and it won't be a big deal after a while." And with all of her wisdom and a smile she replied, "You never get used to it."
Showing posts with label Milestone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Milestone. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Over The Hill Is Just Around The Corner
From January 2008
Ok, so I celebrated my 39th birthday yesterday. Isn't it true that 40 is considered over the hill?! Holy Cow I just can't believe I'm almost 40. And it's not even that I'm that distressed about it as I am amazed. I don't feel that old! I feel like I'm in my early 30's. I guess that really is a good thing... since they do say that you are only as old as you feel. So here's to one more year in my 30's -- may be it be an awesome one!!
Ok, so I celebrated my 39th birthday yesterday. Isn't it true that 40 is considered over the hill?! Holy Cow I just can't believe I'm almost 40. And it's not even that I'm that distressed about it as I am amazed. I don't feel that old! I feel like I'm in my early 30's. I guess that really is a good thing... since they do say that you are only as old as you feel. So here's to one more year in my 30's -- may be it be an awesome one!!
September 11th
Septemeber 11, 2007
Today marks the six year anniversary of the tragic 9/11 events in 2001. I've pondered on it quite a bit today -- this morning when I woke up and then throughout the day at work. This evening I've been watching today's Oprah episode that I recorded, which is a tribute to all of the children who were left behind by a parent who died.
I often think back to what I was doing September 11, 2001 when I first learned of what had been going on. I believe I had heard briefly about the initial events/crash of the first plane while still at home getting ready for work. But what I remember more vividly, is arriving to work and staff having turned on a tv to watch the news. I can remember the focus on the twin towers and the confusion about how a plane could have "accidentally" crashed into one of them. And then as time passed and the additional crashes took place, how scary it was to realize our country was under attack. It was so hard to believe. And it was hard to pull myself away from the tv and do my work. Quite a few of us kept returning to see what the updates were.
I admire the families of those who lost loved ones that worked in those buildings or were on the plane. I think it's much harder to lose someone from such a sudden, tragic event than through other natural causes. But I admire even more, those firemen, policemen, paramedics, and other service workers who put their lives in danger to help others. They knew they were walking or running into a dangerous situation and still bravely did their job. I'm not sure I could have done the same.
My parents used to talk about their memories of Pearl Harbor and what they were doing when they first heard of the attack on our country then. I used to think that our country was invincible to attacks like that ever happening again. But sadly now, I have a memory of my own to relive.
Today marks the six year anniversary of the tragic 9/11 events in 2001. I've pondered on it quite a bit today -- this morning when I woke up and then throughout the day at work. This evening I've been watching today's Oprah episode that I recorded, which is a tribute to all of the children who were left behind by a parent who died.
I often think back to what I was doing September 11, 2001 when I first learned of what had been going on. I believe I had heard briefly about the initial events/crash of the first plane while still at home getting ready for work. But what I remember more vividly, is arriving to work and staff having turned on a tv to watch the news. I can remember the focus on the twin towers and the confusion about how a plane could have "accidentally" crashed into one of them. And then as time passed and the additional crashes took place, how scary it was to realize our country was under attack. It was so hard to believe. And it was hard to pull myself away from the tv and do my work. Quite a few of us kept returning to see what the updates were.
I admire the families of those who lost loved ones that worked in those buildings or were on the plane. I think it's much harder to lose someone from such a sudden, tragic event than through other natural causes. But I admire even more, those firemen, policemen, paramedics, and other service workers who put their lives in danger to help others. They knew they were walking or running into a dangerous situation and still bravely did their job. I'm not sure I could have done the same.
My parents used to talk about their memories of Pearl Harbor and what they were doing when they first heard of the attack on our country then. I used to think that our country was invincible to attacks like that ever happening again. But sadly now, I have a memory of my own to relive.
Class Reunion - Day 2
From July 2007
Yesterday, I participated in the second half of my class reunion. It was just as fun as the first! Some of my classmate's memories are amazing! The first night we were together one of my male classmates reminded me that I was his first kiss (in like the first or second
grade). I didn't remember and really still don't. But what was funny about it, is that I in turn told him that I had a crush on him off and on throughout elementary school. We had a good laugh about it and continued to joke throughout the reunion.
We really didn't have a huge turnout. Probably a bit more than a third of our class, and since we were a small class to start with... that doesn't make many. However, I always like small intimate groups in just about any situation.
Our picnic and tour of the school grounds yesterday afternoon were fun. Some of those buildings I hadn't been in for a very long time. Lots of memories come rushing back... great memories!
We finalized the reunion with a dinner last night. I have to admit I was a bit worn out, but still having fun. I could tell though that I had run out of things to say to some people. In many other ways, it was kind of sad to see it end. Some of the guys were getting together today to play golf. I think we girls should have planned something too!
Yesterday, I participated in the second half of my class reunion. It was just as fun as the first! Some of my classmate's memories are amazing! The first night we were together one of my male classmates reminded me that I was his first kiss (in like the first or second
grade). I didn't remember and really still don't. But what was funny about it, is that I in turn told him that I had a crush on him off and on throughout elementary school. We had a good laugh about it and continued to joke throughout the reunion.We really didn't have a huge turnout. Probably a bit more than a third of our class, and since we were a small class to start with... that doesn't make many. However, I always like small intimate groups in just about any situation.
Our picnic and tour of the school grounds yesterday afternoon were fun. Some of those buildings I hadn't been in for a very long time. Lots of memories come rushing back... great memories!We finalized the reunion with a dinner last night. I have to admit I was a bit worn out, but still having fun. I could tell though that I had run out of things to say to some people. In many other ways, it was kind of sad to see it end. Some of the guys were getting together today to play golf. I think we girls should have planned something too!
Class Reunion - Day 1
From July 2007
My 20 year class reunion has finally arrived, and tonight we had our first gathering. It was so great!! I thought the 10 year one was fun, but I really had a blast tonight. It didn't feel intimidating or scary, but was completely open and light-hearted for me. In fact, (and this WAS true for the 10 year reunion too) I'm amazed at how everyone has matured and are so nice.
What I enjoyed most about tonight though was sitting with two of my past girlf
riends on each side of me. One of them was my best friend in junior high and the other (whom I was also good friends with then) became a best friend by the time we were in high school. The three of us reminisced about slumber parties, crushes, etc. And the funny thing is -- we all live relatively close to each other -- like within an hours drive. I'm not sure why we haven't kept in touch, but I do have a bit more of a resolve to do so this time. We all said we would 10 years ago, but didn't do so well. This time I really want to! AND both of these friends look so great! I think we tend to look better at this age ... I know that I do.
Tomorrow we have two other meetings/activities. At noon we are meeting for a picnic on the school grounds (kids and families invited) and then tomorrow evening we'll be having a dinner together. I'm looking forward to it!
1 Comment: How fun Buffy! :o) I have never gone to a reunion. I've never been notified of one. Maybe they forgot me? Glad you had a wonderful time. (Celia)
My 20 year class reunion has finally arrived, and tonight we had our first gathering. It was so great!! I thought the 10 year one was fun, but I really had a blast tonight. It didn't feel intimidating or scary, but was completely open and light-hearted for me. In fact, (and this WAS true for the 10 year reunion too) I'm amazed at how everyone has matured and are so nice.
What I enjoyed most about tonight though was sitting with two of my past girlf
riends on each side of me. One of them was my best friend in junior high and the other (whom I was also good friends with then) became a best friend by the time we were in high school. The three of us reminisced about slumber parties, crushes, etc. And the funny thing is -- we all live relatively close to each other -- like within an hours drive. I'm not sure why we haven't kept in touch, but I do have a bit more of a resolve to do so this time. We all said we would 10 years ago, but didn't do so well. This time I really want to! AND both of these friends look so great! I think we tend to look better at this age ... I know that I do.Tomorrow we have two other meetings/activities. At noon we are meeting for a picnic on the school grounds (kids and families invited) and then tomorrow evening we'll be having a dinner together. I'm looking forward to it!
1 Comment: How fun Buffy! :o) I have never gone to a reunion. I've never been notified of one. Maybe they forgot me? Glad you had a wonderful time. (Celia)
Friday, July 31, 2009
An Anniversary!
From May 2007 
Today is the first year anniversary of my moving into my very own house! It was Memorial Day weekend last year that I had a small crew of friends helping me clear out my small apartment, load up trucks, drive across town, and unload into my newly purchased home. I can't believe it's been a year! I even went back to the beginning of my blog (which I started July 1st of last year) and read an entry where I was amazed about having lived here for a month. Now it's been a year! And ya know what? I have not ever once regretted it (even though I'm perpetually broke now). I love this house! It may not have all the elements that my dream house has-like a bay window or big front porch-but it's mine (and the bank's).
1 Comment: Happy Anniversary Buffy!!!! :o) Someday I will own a home (I hope), and I too dream of having a big yard, bay window, a garden, and a big front porch. It would be awesome! Maybe someday..... (Celia)
Today is the first year anniversary of my moving into my very own house! It was Memorial Day weekend last year that I had a small crew of friends helping me clear out my small apartment, load up trucks, drive across town, and unload into my newly purchased home. I can't believe it's been a year! I even went back to the beginning of my blog (which I started July 1st of last year) and read an entry where I was amazed about having lived here for a month. Now it's been a year! And ya know what? I have not ever once regretted it (even though I'm perpetually broke now). I love this house! It may not have all the elements that my dream house has-like a bay window or big front porch-but it's mine (and the bank's).
1 Comment: Happy Anniversary Buffy!!!! :o) Someday I will own a home (I hope), and I too dream of having a big yard, bay window, a garden, and a big front porch. It would be awesome! Maybe someday..... (Celia)
20 Years!
From May 17, 2007
It's been twenty years today that I graduated from High School! I can't believe it!!
Reunion plans are in the works, in fact I received a letter earlier this week asking for money (of course), photos, and a bio. A bio? What do I have to say? I swear it doesn't feel like I've done or changed much (even though I know I have), especially since I don't have children to brag about.
Anyway, I added a photo of that great day 20 years ago. What a cheesy, happy grin. You can tell that I was happy as a clam to be gettin' out of the place!
It's been twenty years today that I graduated from High School! I can't believe it!!
Reunion plans are in the works, in fact I received a letter earlier this week asking for money (of course), photos, and a bio. A bio? What do I have to say? I swear it doesn't feel like I've done or changed much (even though I know I have), especially since I don't have children to brag about.
Anyway, I added a photo of that great day 20 years ago. What a cheesy, happy grin. You can tell that I was happy as a clam to be gettin' out of the place!
Saturday, July 25, 2009
MAKIN' THE BIG MOVE WITH MY BABIES
FROM SUNDAY, JULY 2, 2006
I've just recently become a first time home buyer. It's quite exciting and I can't believe I've already passed my month anniversary of living here. I'm still getting settled though. I think that will be an endless task. Why do I have so much junk? And why do I think I need to keep it all?!
My roomies, Mia and Gabby, pictured in the photo above, have taken the move well and seem to love the extra space. They're not sure yet if they like the neighboring strays though. (I'm not so sure yet either.)
Gee, do the top two paragraphs just spell out Single Desperate Girl or what?! A packrat and a cat lover. Oh well, so I fit the stereotype. I enjoy almost every minute of it!
I've just recently become a first time home buyer. It's quite exciting and I can't believe I've already passed my month anniversary of living here. I'm still getting settled though. I think that will be an endless task. Why do I have so much junk? And why do I think I need to keep it all?! My roomies, Mia and Gabby, pictured in the photo above, have taken the move well and seem to love the extra space. They're not sure yet if they like the neighboring strays though. (I'm not so sure yet either.) Gee, do the top two paragraphs just spell out Single Desperate Girl or what?! A packrat and a cat lover. Oh well, so I fit the stereotype. I enjoy almost every minute of it!
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